I was going to title this post “Pre-Wedding Diet” but I thought that didn’t really sound right since I am not actually “dieting”. People that know me and my eating habits know I couldn’t possibly have the self-control to diet. Food is my weakness. My absolute favorite activity is to go out to eat… breakfast, lunch or dinner, I like them all! So, about a month ago I went and had my dress altered to fit a little snugger. This last Wednesday I got to go pick it up, after I tried it on, to make sure it fit correctly. I was so excited to get to take the dress home, I may have even had a little sparkle in my eye…..and then, my mother and the alterations gal spent 5 minutes trying to zip it up. Wow, not how I wanted this to go! As soon as it was zipped and hooked, I began gasping for air. I couldn’t breathe. I was going to suffocate and die before I even got to get married. This was a nightmare. I tried to tell myself that it would be ok, I will just back off the heavy snacking for the next two months till the big day. After 30 more seconds I realized I would have to live like an ethiopian in order for this dress to fit! Luckily, I realized I was wearing a very thick undergarment so I could remove that and finally breathe again… barely. Now happy with the fit I left the bridal store reminding myself that I would still need to “watch” what I eat. For those of you that have seen the movie Bride Wars, “you don’t alter a Vera Wang to fit you, you alter you for Vera”. In my case I suppose it’s “you don’t alter a Davids Bridal gown, you alter you for your gown”. It is now Sunday, it has been 4 days since I vowed to only munch on healthy food and snacks like veggies, fruit and maybe some candy.. just a little (hey I can’t give up everything cold turkey). Thursday night I went to a sushi and chinese food all-you-can-eat buffet; but I had to it was their grand opening… Friday, I had a Carl’s Jr. bacon cheeseburger and fries for lunch; once again I felt this was justified because if I didn’t give in to my initial craving I would leave work and head straight for Carl’s Jr. for maybe two double-bacon western cheeseburgers which would be quite worse. After work it was nachos and loaded potato skins from Fridays. Saturday I was good..until I had 4 large slices of Roundtable pepperoni pizza and a chocolate cupcake. Oops. Today is Sunday, I woke up planning on having nutritious meals and maybe hitting the gym. So far I have laid on the couch all day, alternating between HGTV, the Lifetime Network, and Desperate Housewives. Oh, and after eating scrambled eggs with sausage, I ate a bunch of candy, thick slice of banana bread and… 4 more pieces of pepperoni pizza. What is wrong with me? I had consumed all of that by 2pm today. I have a serious portion control problem. Immediately after I scarfed the pizza down, I confessed to Justin what I had just done and told him this is why I do not like having this kind of food in my home, I can’t stop myself. It’s almost as if I have to keep eating it in case I never get to experience its amazing delicious taste again though I will probably get the chance to eat pizza next week! My mind must not be working properly with my stomach, this can’t be normal. Surely I will be able to maintain control for two more months… surely….

I think I write these posts for my own entertainment, I may be the only one laughing so bear with me…
Tuesday night is currently my TV night. Justin is well aware of this. I let him know Monday as well as Tuesday afternoon that I need him to “babysit” the kids (or dogs as most people call them). I can’t have any interruptions or I get cranky. I can’t tell you the elation I feel every Tuesday morning when I realize that I have 3 hours of enjoyable TV to watch that night. Now, understand, enjoyable does not mean educational or totally wholesome. While Justin enjoys the history channel and any engineering, technical program… my Tuesday night line up consists of Nip/Tuck, the “new” 90210, and a new favorite, The Real Housewives of Orange County. I know I know, Justin has already pointed out how I am frying my brain with this nonsense. He refuses to even sit in the same room with me Tuesday nights. I think I get a kick out of the drama and non-realistic lifestyles of these people. I am 100% fine and happy with my life but it is still amusing to observe these crazy characters and their troubled lives. Tuesday beginning at 7pm, I reserve the family room for me and myself only.. maybe Trixie too. I need complete silence to enjoy my shows.. and a bowl of popcorn. Anyone that knows me and has witnessed me watching TV can attest to the level at which I put the volume. I have been tested and have perfect hearing by the way, I just like to make sure I hear every word spoken on the 60 inch television. I have yet to meet someone who doesn’t tell me to “turn it down a little”. So, every glorious Tuesday (atleast for this TV season) Justin locks himself in the office with the dogs and I blast the TV, reminding him to “talk to me” on the commercials. I really don’t think it’s too much to ask, it’s one day a week for heavens sake. Being that it’s Tuesday and T minus 1.5 hours… TGIT.. Thank Goodness It’s Tuesday!

54.2 degrees…. you may be thinking that’s the temperature outside. Well, let me tell you, it’s the temperature in our home. No joke. I can barely type this entry right now, my poor fingers are turning purple. I don’t think it’s considerably normal to wear beanies and scarves and snow socks… inside your house. So, you may be wondering why it’s like the artic circle in here. Our heater decided to quit pumping out warm air a couple days ago. It’s quite terrible actually. Painful would be another word to describe it. My three dog children and I are huddled next to our small space heater, trying to survive. I think I know what it feels like to trek through the Catskill Mountains or the Appalachians hoping to persevere through the bitter cold. I think I need some wolf or beaver skins, or whatever those Alaskans wear in their igloos. I am typing this in 2 minute increments… I have to pump out a few sentences and then stumble to the space heater to defrost a little. The blessed heater repair man is due around 12pm. I can only hope my family will endure this harrowing experience. Maybe I should write a book about it… “Mother survives aching cold with three dog children”… sounds like a best seller to me…

I just wanted to introduce you to my sweet little baby princess Trixie. She is my everything! She turns one next month and yes, I plan on throwing her a birthday party. Edible dog cake and all. At 5 1/2 pounds she can take down Hartwin, steal his rawhide bones, and eats out of his bowl with him at every meal. If anyone comes near her bowl or her bones, she can produce the most vicious growl, you would think she might eat your hand off. I swear she learned that from Max. Max can bare his huge teeth like none other before him. Max is our problem child, he sets a bad example for his little sister. Trixie is daddy’s little girl. She has dad wrapped around her finger. It’s quite cute actually. I am trying to convince him that Trixie gets to be in the wedding. How adorable would it be for my niece, the flower girl, to walk with Trix down the aisle in a pink fluffy doggy dress. Justin isn’t too fond of the idea. He thinks its ridiculous. But then again, he always thinks I am ridiculous when it comes to Trix… she has a car seat, she has a Dooney & Burke bag, and she has more clothes than him including a cheerleading outfit, pink bunny suit, Juicy Couture hoodie, a princess dress and a leg warmers and scarf set. Doesn’t he understand that all that is necessary? I need to make sure she has an ensemble for any and every occasion. She also has quite the collection of hair bows and clips. I told Justin yesterday that I wanted to get another yorkie so Trixie could have a playmate… Justin said I am losing my mind.

So most of you know that Justin and I have two German Shepherds and a yorkie. We are like those crazy cat people but with dogs. Not too mention I want 5 kids, but we will save that for another day. Our younger German Shepherd Max is really crazy and hyper all the time. It’s possible he should be medicated for ADD. The other morning I grabbed the two big boys bowls to go fill them up in the garage with their food. They usually get all excited and run around the couches in anticipation. I still can’t figure out why dogs get so excited for the same dry bland food for every meal. I wish this worked for boyfriends as well.. Anyways, Max was especially excited this one morning and as he sprinted around the couch, our oldest dog Hartwin sprinted the opposite direction around the couch and it resulted in a head-on collision. The corner of the wall seemed to jump in at the last moment.. in other words, Max’s face plowed into our wall, breaking it. The sound of my two 80 lb beasts charging the wall was practically ear deafening. A few moments later I noticed that Max hadn’t come out without any injuries either. His whole area around his eye was scraped of all the fur. Obviously as a worrying mother I was scared he was hurt or in pain. About 30 seconds later he was back in action, prancing around with his favorite pink rubber football. Dogs must have skulls as hard as rocks.

Ok, since Justin, my wonderful husband-to-be is taking so long to write a post, I guess I will take on the responsibility of keeping it updated. Geezo, I have to plan a wedding and blog regularly? Oh the expectations! So, wedding planning, even for a very small wedding, is pretty crazy and stressful. I thought by having a small intimate wedding I would bypass all the stress and bridezillaness (is that a word?). Mind you, I am not even close to becoming bridezilla…. I assure you I now understand why all those girls turn into one!! The food, the flowers, the invitations… not to mention the dresses. Miraculously I found my dress in one day after only looking at two stores! I managed the impossible! Talented, I know. But the bridesmaid dresses are another story. Apparently they stopped making dresses in pink and yellow. Guess I missed that memo. I told my mom I was ok with pink Hanes XL beefy t-shirts with a yellow ribbon tied around my dear sisters waists. Mom said if I wanted my sisters to actually come to the wedding, I would have to think of something else. Darn, and here I was thinking I was being creative. Oh, and don’t even get me started on trying to convince Justin to wear a pastel pink vest and tie with his ivory tux. I guess he has to draw the line somewhere. Of course I threw in the line “if you loved me you would wear the pink vest” but I don’t think that got me anywhere. Maybe I should try the “marriage is about compromise” line and see if that nets me anything…